My AMAZING Support Group!

It's been awhile since I have blogged and my last blog was in pure desperation for some sleep. I don't believe that we are sleeping all that much better, but I have come to terms with it, and have a much better outlook about it all. In fact, things are going really well with these Little Lowerys and I'm finally at a place of peace, calm, and happiness...ok, that's a load of bull-hockey, but most days I feel confident and enjoy the time we spend together. There is certainly not much calm in this household!!

A few days ago, Miss Norah decided she no longer wanted to sleep in her crib. I knew the day would come but oh my, it took me by surprise. She crawled out her crib each and every time I attempted to put her down for a nap. No nap was had and Daddy converted the crib to a toddler bed that night. She's doing fine but our day time naps have not happened yet and she has stayed up late the last few nights. As any parent of a toddler would know, a few days of no naps and staying up late could lead to a cranky little girl. Here is where my story begins....

I take Norah (and Connor) to gymnastics every Thursday morning. Norah really loves it and does pretty well at what is being asked of her. The parents are an active part in the class and most of the class is just spent with the kids running, jumping, bouncing all on their own. There is a little structured stretching and dancing in the beginning and end of this class. Like any structured activity that they do at this age, sometimes the kids participate and sometimes they are crying and screaming outside of the circle, while the rest of the parents pretend to ignore it, knowing we've all been there! Well like I said, Norah needs some sleep and I knew this could be a problem during the structured part of gymnastics. She really wasn't too bad and there was another little girl who was having an even worse day, so this Mom and I found each other sitting in the "waiting area" giving our girls a rest. The Mom and I talked about what was going on with Norah, she empathetically said she's been there and we laughed about our crying toddlers. From the beginning of this whole Mommy adventure, this is the story of every Mom that I've ever spoke to. They are nice, sympathetic, someone to make you feel like you are not alone in this, and a stranger who you feel like you immediately connect to because of your children. Well, I ran into my first Mom who was the complete opposite...

Norah recovered, played hard during free play and then was TOTALLY not having the end of the class circle. We were sitting just outside of it as she's flailing, screaming (at Norah decibel's..anyone who knows her, knows how loud this is) and was just gone. Keep in mind I'm also holding a squirmy Connor who just wants to go back to the bouncy house. Out of nowhere a Mom in the circle (who is supposed to be pretending that she can't hear us) yells out "WELL, isn't today a tantrum kind of day!!!" as she glares right at me and interrupts the Hokey Pokey. I'm absolutely mortified and instead of my dumb, happy laugh it off, I just get completely silent and hope that my silence and straight face says it all. I'm pretty sure the back of my hand wanted to say a lot more!! So I decide that Norah is in no shape to continue on to get her hand stamped after class and I also don't want to reward her for this behavior... although my heart just aches for how tired she must be. We head out to get our shoes and jackets on and the first Mom who was very supportive comes over and says, "Isn't it funny that the Mom of the kid who throws the most tantrums has to single out YOUR daughter!? Don't worry, I got your back!" And that is a happy ending right there, right? :)

As I was driving around the greater New Haven area, 7 times, so that Norah could get some sleep, I started thinking about this Mom. The old me would have stewed on it and just been mad the rest of the day. I ended up almost in happy tears instead thinking about a very special group of ladies.....

I am part of a Mommy group who branched out of an existing Mommy group with lots of rules, and who kicked out Moms with part-time jobs...umm...wow. Anyways, this group of Moms are phenomenal people with laid back personalities and incredible love and support for one another. It's only been a year that I've known a few of the Moms and I can already imagine us all growing old together and our children becoming life-long friends. There has never ever been any "snarky comments" given to one another about parenting choices or out of control kids. Everyone just gets it. We're all going through this together and we all understand that being a Mother isn't about outdoing one another, being more crafty than the other, showing off how your child walks better, talks better, eats better than any other. Everyone just gets together and we just "be". Many of us have a few children and without hesitation we get a snack for someone else's child, grab a crawler from getting into trouble, console a crying child with a hug while taking them to their mother, play with one another's children, read to one another's children, I could just go on and on on how amazing these Mothers are. Many of the Moms in this group watch each other's children as we all have husbands who work a lot and aren't home very much. When Norah was really sick, I had a wonderful Mom call in her babysitter to watch her own son and then she walked Connor around the pediatrician's parking lot while I tended to Norah. I want to cry now thinking of what a selfless move that was. THESE WOMEN ARE AMAZING!!!! Now that we've branched out, I've met some friends of friends who are also such wonderful people. I feel so fortunate to belong to such a nice, non-dramatic, non-condensing, happy, supportive Mommy group!!

So instead of stewing on my first experience with a nasty Mom, I had a beautiful moment to reflect on the wonderful friends that I do have, and how we will never be anything like this woman. I hope she finds her own Mommy group to realize that she doesn't need to act like this.

So I just want to say a BIG THANK YOU to my own Mommy group for welcoming me and my kids in and always being there for each other! I truly hope we are all at our children's high school graduations together! I love you all! :)